9 words that make moms feel like failures

Words have power. They can boost us up or deflate us. So it’s annoying that aspects of pregnancy, birth, and motherhood are described in such negative terms. Here are my least favorites, in no particular order:

1. Stay-at-home-mom (SAHM). This makes me think of being literally stuck at home (lying on the couch, watching TV, and eating bon bons). We know how far this is from the reality of being a mom. But the other options aren’t great, either. Full-time mom? (Does that mean moms who work outside the home are “part-time” moms? No, thanks.)
2. Working mom. Aren’t all moms working moms? Raising kids is work, even though we don’t get paid for it. I’ve heard variations like “work-outside-the-home mom,” but can we come up with something shorter and catchier? Please don’t say WOTHM.
3. Contractions. The word itself makes me wince. Contraction. Ouch. No wonder labor seems so scary. Hypnobirthers call contractions “surges,” which I think more accurately describes it.
4. Water breaking. You’re stressed out about labor and those scary-sounding contractions, and to make things worse, you’ve just “broken” something. Again, I like the hypnobirthers’ term better: water “releasing.”
5. Failure to progress. Women who don’t progress through labor within a specific time frame often get tagged “FTP” and encouraged to have a c-section. But as author Rita Rubin points out, “failure to progress” might simply be failure to wait for a mom-to-be to give birth at her own pace.
Meanwhile, blaming the woman giving birth for this “failure” makes her feel like she’s flunked the first test of motherhood.
6. Mommy brain/pregnancy brain. Okay, I get this one – and for me, it was real. Hormones and sleep deprivation made me so slow and forgetful, I’d laugh at a joke ten seconds after the punchline. But I dislike terms that make moms sound dumb, because we’re not. Check out this article about how the brains of new moms actually get bigger.
7. Advanced maternal age. When a 72-year-old woman can give birth to twins, it’s laughable that a 35-year-old pregnant woman is defined as being of “advanced age.” As one AMA mom-to-be in Babycenter’s Community pointed out, “I’m not ready for the nursing home … I’m 37.”
8. Incompetent cervix. Your cervix is softer, shorter, or weaker than usual … but is it “incompetent”? This harsh characterization just adds insult to injury. The powers that be must agree with me, since this term is being phased out and replaced by “cervical insufficiency.”
9. Failure to thrive. Another new-mom “failure,” though this refers to the baby not gaining enough weight. Of course, this is super-serious and not to be diminished. But the word “thrive” is so all-encompassing, this diagnosis makes it sound like your child is doomed to never be okay. The good news is this term is also on its way out, replaced by the more neutral “failure to gain weight.”

Do these terms bug you too? Have I missed any?

by Marcella Gates, found here.

I'm TOTALLY baking this to Lior's 1st birthday! :D

Sunny Day Rainbow Cake
2 boxes white cake mix
24 oz of clear diet soda (2 cans, ginger ale and sprite work well)
gel food colouring
16 oz whipped topping
2 oz instant fat-free sugar-free pudding mix (2 smallish boxes)


The Rainbowing
Measure the total volume (by my estimate, 64 oz), then divide by 6 and measure into separate bowls. There are 8 oz in a cup, so 64/6 = 10 to 11 oz, or 1 cup + 2 tbsp.
Stir colour into each bowl with its own spoon. For the first colour into the pan, measure out 2/3 to 3/4 of your mix (in this case about 1 c) as close to the middle as you can. Drop in your first three colours, then work on the other pan with the last three colours. So if you’re doing rainbow order, the first pan should have red, then orange, then yellow, and now the purple, blue and green go into the second pan. As a recap, this is so both layers are roughly the same size.
Bake the cake for however long the box tells you to bake it. Check it when the box says to, but usually it’ll need an extra 5 or 10 minutes or maybe more because of the density of the soda method. Just keep baking, checking back every 5 minutes or so until a toothpick to the center comes out clean. Let cool completely before moving to a wire rack.

The Frostinging
Meanwhile, make your frosting. Just mix the pudding mix in with the whipped topping for a few minutes. Dye if you’re into that.
Frost your fat-free cake with your fat-free whipped frosting. Eat.

Read original article here.

Preggos' Flashmob

This flashmob is supposedly pregnant women breakdancing in London. YEAH RIGHT. :)
Anyway, the idea is cute and promotes a consciousness campaign about women who die during pregnancy and birth due to the lack of health care. More info on their site.

Don't Forget to Laugh! :)

Your baby can learn sign language! Here's how to say:

• "Please change my diaper": Turn beet red and make straining expression, then smile.
• "I'd like something to eat, please": Cram fist in mouth and suck wildly.
• "I'm tired": Make a series of weeping gestures before closing eyes and lolling head backward.
• "Please pass me that thing up there that I can't reach": Point and grunt, then continue pointing and open mouth into screaming position.
• "No thank you. I think I've had enough": Throw food or object to floor with exaggerated grin.

From BabyCenter's newsletter

New moms' brain may grow after childbirth

Fri, Oct 22, 2010 (HealthDay News)

The brains of new mothers actually get bigger within months of giving birth, according to new research.
The researchers, most from the Yale University School of Medicine, said that the growth was likely fueled by changes in levels of certain hormones just after birth. They reported finding expansion in areas of the brain associated with behavior and motivation.
The researchers also found that mothers who were most enthusiastic about their babies had more growth in key parts of the mid-brain -- areas linked to maternal motivation, rewards and emotion processing -- than did mothers who were more reserved about their infants.
The findings, from a small study reported in the October issue of Behavioral Neuroscience, suggest that a new mother's desire to look after her baby may be driven less by instinct and more by active brain building, according to two neuroscientists whose commentary on the study was also published in the journal.
Led by neuroscientist Pilyoung Kim, the study compared MRI images of 19 women taken two to three weeks and three to four months after they gave birth at Yale-New Haven Hospital, in Connecticut. The women averaged about 33 years old, all were breastfeeding, nearly half had other children and none had postpartum depression.
The brain scans revealed small but significant increases in gray matter volume in various parts of the brain, including areas associated with maternal motivation (hypothalamus), reward and emotion processing (substantia nigra and amygdala), sensory integration (parietal lobe) and reasoning and judgment (prefrontal cortex).
In adults, gray matter generally does not change size over a few months without significant learning, brain injury or illness, or a major shift in the environment, according to background information in a news release from the American Psychological Association.
Hormonal changes that occur immediately after birth, including increases in estrogen, oxytocin and prolactin, may make new mothers' brains more susceptible to reshaping in response to their infant, according to the researchers.
Mothers who suffer postpartum depression may experience reductions, instead of growth, in these same brain areas, the researchers suggested. They added that further research into what occurs in the brains of at-risk mothers could lead to new treatments.

-- Robert Preidt

Found this in here. 

Celebration

For the 1st time, my dear baby Lior (10 and a half months old) slept  through the whole night - from 7:30pm to 5:30am, a total of 10h straight!! Oooo-hoooo! :D
I only need to get him to sleep 'till 6:30 in the morning, and we're done!.....

The answer to that misterious question

Sadly True

Don't forget to laugh!.... :)

Mila's Daydreams is closing up

So, no more Mila's Daydream pictures in the blog. I wanted to keep that first one there, because it means everything to me. The flowers she is picking are from that bouquet I got in hospital after giving birth. Well, I knew this was going to end some day anyway. I will continue taking photos every now and then, while Mila is still a baby, but this time I won't publish them at my blog, just to avoid misusage and violation. But this ain't the end of this blog either. I still want to be in touch with you people and share something from my maternity leave with you. So maybe this blog is going to be more like "While my baby is taking her nap, I try to blog about something." And sure there's going to be some creative things in the future too, let's see what we can come up. Maybe Mila is going to take pictures of me, or maybe I'll write some haiku's about her first words, or maybe there's going to be some other creative outbursts from my not-so-desperate housewife life. Mila is a great muse for sure.

 

Read the whole story here.

In defense of my messy house

by Carolyn Robertson

A friend of mine whose kids are just about grown recently passed down to me a memento of motherhood that she’d had for years. It’s a magnet that is now proudly attached to my own fingerprint-smeared fridge that reads, in black and neon pink: “Good mothers have sticky floors, filthy ovens and happy kids.” Here’s hoping.

Reading Kristina Sauerwein’s post on dirty houses last week I was glad to learn that I’m not the only one with a home that doesn’t quite sparkle. Things here tend to be smudgy and cluttered and no matter how often I vacuum there are still clumps of dog hair that roll across the floor like tiny tumbleweed. A toy storage center in bright primary colors stretches across one wall of the living room. The liquor cabinet is now home (well, in part) to craft supplies, there’s a preschool-sized table and chair set next to the couch and the floor is usually strewn with dropped teether toys and an ambitious Thomas the Train track. Add the usual baby paraphernalia – swing, bouncy chair, Jumperoo – and there’s not much room to move around here.

But you know what? I’ve stopped worrying about it. I’m not saying we live in filth – I wipe away, sop up and tidy as best I can. But after too much time and frustration spent trying to keep on top of it all I had an epiphany of sorts. There will be plenty of time down the road for spotless floors and a gleaming bath tub. Hell, it’ll be something to keep me busy as I wait for my teenage daughters to come home from their first dates. But right now is the time for toys, for clutter, for watercolor paint splattered on the side table and greasy little fingerprints on the faucets.

My house may not make the pages of any magazine, but I’m okay with that. It’s lived in. More specifically, it’s lived in by kids.

Read original article here at Momformation blog

Dads changing diapers :)

Pretty funny.... But having a helpful husband like mine it's hard to believe people actually act like that. I hope your husband change diapers better! :)

2bMommy - Blog for parents

Blog for parents (in Hebrew): http://www.2bmommy.com/

Out the Door, On Time! 12 Strategies for Speeding Up Your Mornings

No one ever told you that motherhood was synonymous with chronic lateness. But from packing the depleted diaper bag to getting your dawdlers motivated, there are plenty of reasons you probably feel like you haven’t gotten anywhere on time since your babe was born. Let’s face it: Kids dilly-dally, moms nag -- and no one gets out the door any faster. To the rescue: solid strategies from organization experts and real moms like you for getting your kids (and yourself) out the door.
 

Read the whole article here.

A dog may help guard against childhood eczema

Thu, Sep 30, 2010 (HealthDay News) -- Man's best friend protects against eczema in young children, but his nemesis, the cat, does not, new research shows.
Children with a dog in the home at age 1 had a significantly reduced risk of eczema at age 4, but children who had a cat were more likely to have the ailment at the same age, the study found. Dog ownership also conferred protection against becoming allergic to cats.
"It's speculative, but possible that the protective effect is due to a sort of natural immunotherapy where children who are exposed to dogs become tolerant over time in the same way that people on allergy shots develop tolerance to allergens," said study author Dr. Tolly Epstein, an assistant professor in the division of immunology, allergy and rheumatology at the University of Cincinnati Medical School.
Or, dog allergens may have other effects on the immune system that are not yet understood, she added.
The study was done using newborns in the Cincinnati area whose parents had allergies or eczema, making the children more likely to develop the condition. Skin tests were done to see which infants were allergic to dogs and cats, regardless of whether their families had either.
Eczema is an itchy skin inflammation and may be associated with allergies (atopic eczema) or not (non-atopic eczema), Epstein explained. Between 15 percent and 30 percent of children have had eczema, which can come and go, or disappear by a certain age. Both genetics and environment are thought to play key roles in the development of the condition.
Epstein said eczema rates have risen dramatically in the past 30 years, and researchers want to understand the causes.
The study found that children who tested positive for a dog allergy and did not live with a dog had four times the risk of getting eczema than those who tested positive and did own a dog by age 4. People can test positive for an allergy but not have any symptoms, according to experts.
The higher the dog allergen levels were in the homes, the lower the risk was for the child developing eczema by age 4, according to the study.
Most of the 636 children in the study were white. Among the 131 black children, few had dogs as pets, but those whose families got a cat by the time they were age 1 were 12 times more likely to have eczema at age 4. However, due to the small numbers, the results were not significant.
The study also looked at the association between eczema and eggs, milk and nuts, some of the most common food allergies in infants. Some experts recommend delaying common allergic foods as a strategy to protect children against allergies but the study findings did not support that.
"We tend to be so focused on food allergies with young children, but the study showed aeroallergens [airborne allergens such as pet dander or auto emissions] may be more important than has been previously understood," Epstein said.
The study found that delaying the introduction of eggs into infants' diets may have no impact on their risk for getting eczema in later years, with some indication that it benefited babies when introduced early. However, those findings were not statistically significant. Findings relating to nuts also were inconclusive.
Diet guidelines for infants recommend no solid foods until 6 months, with cereal introduction after that to monitor the effect, said Dr. Wanda Phipatanakul, an associate physician at Children's Hospital in Boston.
Phipatanakul said the study, published in an upcoming print issue of the Journal of Pediatrics, was carefully done, but was not definitive. Other research had shown conflicting results on the impact of cats and dogs, she said.
"The jury is still out," said Phipatanakul, who is also an assistant professor of pediatrics at Harvard Medical School. "I don't think anyone, including the authors, is saying to go get a few dogs, or don't get a cat to reduce your risk."
People with allergies should avoid what causes their allergies, "or you will keep getting symptoms," she said.
"They did a lot of advanced analyses and looked at it [the data] in detail," Phipatanakul said, adding that she encourages more research to help doctors "learn more and employ better interventions or strategies."

-- Ellin Holohan

How to Raise the Men We'd Want to Marry

Attention mothers of sons: Women of the future are counting on you. Valerie Monroe tells how to bring up a good, kind, happy, mindful, nongrunting husband-to-be.

Read the whole article here.

Mila's Daydreams

Adele is a young mommy who decided to use her maternity leave to do something very creative - to imagine her newborn Mila's dreams and stage them around her whenever she takes a nap.

Beautiful and creative images that can't be missed! :)

See it at: http://milasdaydreams.blogspot.com/

13 Things No One Told You About Having a Baby

You’re pregnant. You’re totally excited—and totally freaked out. Vague images of pushing strollers and changing diapers fill your mind, but what will it really be like to be a mom?
Here are 13 things that your friends and all the other parents you know (including your own!) haven’t told you about having a baby.

1. Everything Around You Will Suddenly Seem Ridiculously Dangerous
2. After Being Star of the Show for Nine Months, You Will Be Upstaged
3. You Will Never Look the Same in a Bathing Suit. (Sorry)
4. You Will Have Moments—Particularly at Night—When You Feel Insane
5. Perfect Moms Will Be an Enigma To You
6. Breastfeeding is the Most Stressful Skill You Will Ever Have to Acquire, and You May Never Acquire It
7. Maternity Leave Is Harder Than a Full-Time Job
8. Despite What You Think, You Will Make Mountains Out of Molehills
9. The Littlest Things Will Sometimes Exasperate and Enrage You
10. You Will Never Get Out of the House at the Time You Expected
11. People Will Ask if You Need Help—Say Yes Every Time
12. Even If You’re Not the Competitive Type, You’ll Be Drawn Into One-Up Conversations
13. Being Alone Will Suddenly Become The Most Wonderful Thing Ever


Read more at the original article in iVillage

A mommy's night odissey

3am. 7-month-old Lior wakes up crying. I give a minute or two to see if he'll go back to sleep on his own. He doesn't. I drag myself to his room and give him the pacifier. He calms down for a few seconds, drops the pacifier and starts complaining again. I try that 2 or 3 times, and then I say: I get it I get it, you're hungry. Not to worry, your bottle is on the way.
Knowing that he almost always wakes up hungry in the middle of the night, I leave a bottle with water prepared in his room and a can of formula, so I prepare it very quickly.
But then I remember - he's got a rash, so maybe I should change him before I give him the bottle, this way he'll be dry and clean, he'll eat and fall asleep in a second.
I take him to the changing table. As I open up his diaper, he starts screaming and jumping making it impossible for me to change him. Of course, he's hungry, the poor thing. I make a deal with him: if you can hold your bottle still on your own, you can have it as I change you... - I say to him while I put the bottle on his mouth and his tiny hands to hold it on the sides. He holds it quite well, so I start changing him. Since he only had some pee I just dry him a bit and put on tons of cream for the rash. When I finish, I lift him and put him on my lap so that he can finish the bottle. He starts screaming again.
What now? - I think to myself - Maybe he'd rather lay down?
So I put him back on his crib and he keeps screaming until I put the bottle back on his mouth. He drinks a few sips and starts screaming again. - What's the problem honey? How can mommy help you? - I ask, a bit hopeless.
He looks up at me and goes: prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrraf pfffff prrrrr.
- Ok, so that's what's been bothering you. Why didn't you tell me so before I changed you?
I take him back to the changing table, with the bottle he didn't finish yet. He keeps drinking from the bottle as I wipe him a bit with his own diaper. Then I remember an article I read earlier about baby rash saying "Some parents keep cotton balls and a squirt bottle or an insulated container of warm water at the changing table for easy, gentle cleanups." So I thought, maybe it's better to wipe him with cotton and warm water. Since he finished his bottle already, I put it aside and took him naked and diaperless on my arms to go for some warm water in the kitchen. After a few steps, he goes "blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrgh!" so that me, my hair, my pajamas and the whole corridor were filled with the formula that couldn't possibly stay in his stomach after all the moving from one place to the other while he was eating.
It took me a moment to figure that I should just ignore what just happened and worry about Lior. 6 more steps towards the kettle and I start feeling this warmth in my body. Yes. He peed on what was left of a dry pajama, and the whole kitchen floor.
Long long long story short, I take the damn water, clean him up, get him to sleep, wash the floors with pee and vomit, wash his bottles and put on the sterilizer. When I turn the microwave on and move towards the shower, I look at the time: 4:15. I search desperately for a clean pajamas, enter the shower, wash my hair and clean myself from all those nice fluids. I get to bed at almost 5am. At 5:45am he decided it's time to get up... I turned to my dear husband full of tenderness and threatened his life so that he'd stay up with our beautiful, smiling, good-humored and way too awake baby....

iVillage Introduces New Pregnancy + Parenting Site!

Check Out the New Pregnancy + Parenting Site on iVillage.com!
iVillage has got a big announcement: the "birth" of their new and improved Pregnancy & Parenting site, with what-to-buy gear guides, a baby-namer tool, week-by-week detailed sonogram slide shows and more for every step of your pregnancy, from trying to conceive to bringing your baby home. Check it out at http://www.ivillage.com/pregnancy-parenting.

The Safe Kids/Safe Dogs Project

Through education of child, parent, dog owner and the public in general, dog-related accidents can be lessened greatly.   The Project is always being adapted and expanded.  Presently, we cover children, dog owners, expectant/pre-adoptive families, field/delivery workers, and adults. The Project can be adapted for various professions as well. 

http://safekidssafedogs.com/

שינה והתפתחות - התפתחות דפוסי השינה

Taken from: http://www.tau.ac.il/~sadeh/clinic/sleep2.htm

שינה והתפתחות

התפתחות דפוסי השינה

דפוסי השינה והערות עוברים תהליך מואץ ביותר של התפתחות בשנה הראשונה של חיי התינוק. בהמשך, תהליך ההתפתחות הוא איטי וצנוע יותר. הילוד ישן כ-16 שעות בממוצע בימים הראשונים לחייו. הוא ישן בתפזורת על פני היממה בתקופות קצרות של שינה (בד"כ 3-4 שעות) ותקופות קצרות יותר של ערות. כבר מהלידה קיימים הבדלים גדולים בדפוסי השינה של התינוקות. חלק מהתינוקות ישנים כ-20 שעות או יותר וחלקם מסתפקים רק ב-10 שעות או פחות. חלק מהתינוקות ישנים 4-5 שעות ברציפות וחלקם לא מסוגלים לישון יותר משעה ללא יקיצה (ראה מאמר מדעי באנגלית על שנת היילוד כאן ומאמר מדעי באנגלית על התפתחות השינה כאן).

במהלך השנה הראשונה (ובעיקר בחצי הראשון שלה) חל תהליך התפתחות מהיר מאד שבו השינה מתרכזת בלילה והופכת ליותר ויותר רציפה. שנת היום הולכת ומצטמצמת בהדרגה. עד גיל הגן שנת היום הולכת ונעלמת כליל.

תהליך התרכזות השינה בלילה והפיכתה לשינה רציפה הוא תהליך מורכב ביותר. הוא מושפע מגורמים פיזיולוגיים ומגורמים סביבתיים ודרכי הטיפול של ההורים. שיבושים בתהליך היווצרות השינה הרציפה מובילים להפרעות השינה השכיחות ביותר בשנים הראשונות. בעיות אלה מתבטאות בקשיי הרדמות ויקיצות מרובות וממושכות בלילה שמטרידות כ-20 עד 30 אחוז מכלל הילדים בשלוש השנים הראשונות.

מאפיין נוסף שמשתנה בצורה דרמטית במהלך ההתפתחות המוקדמת הוא כמות הזמן שהילד מבלה בשינה שמכונה "שנת חלום" (REM sleep). שינה זו מאופיינת בתנועות עיניים מהירות, דפוס נשימה לא סדיר ופעילות מוחית מוגברת ביותר. בנוסף ניתן לראות אצל תינוקות עוויתות של הפנים ואת החיוכים הראשונים בזמן שנת החלום. שינה זו מכונה שנת חלום כיוון שכאשר מעירים ילדים או מבוגרים בזמן שנת החלום הם בדרך כלל מדווחים על זיכרון וחוויה של חלום. היילוד מבלה כ-50% מזמן השינה בשנת חלום. כלומר בממוצע התינוק "משקיע" 8 שעות ביממה לשנת החלום. בהמשך ההתפתחות כמות שעת החלום הולכת ופוחתת ומגיעה לכמות של 1-2 שעות ביממה. הסיבה שתינוקות וילדים מבלים זמן רב בשנת חלום היא ככל הנראה ששנת החלום חיונית להתפתחות והבשלת המוח. כמו כן מחקרים רבים הראו שבשנת החלום המוח מעבד מידע שקלט במשך היום ומאכסן מידע רב בזיכרון לטווח ארוך. כלומר אם פוגעים משמעותית בשנת החלום תפגע הזכירה של מידע שנלמד במהלך הערות.

עם העלייה בגיל שנת הילדים ממשיכה להתקצר ומספר היקיצות הליליות הולך ופוחת. יחד עם זאת אחוז גבוה מהילדים ממשיך לסבול משינה מקוטעת ולא רציפה (ראה מאמר מדעי באנגלית על שינה בילדי הגן כאן). בגיל ביה"ס השינה ממשיכה להתקצר. הילדים מתלוננים על עייפות יומית הולכת וגוברת ועדיין ילדים רבים סובלים משינה מקוטעת למדי (ראה מאמר מדעי באנגלית על שינה בילדי ביה"ס כאן). בגיל ההתבגרות השינה ממשיכה להתקצר. המתבגרים נוטים לעכב את זמן ההליכה לשינה (ללכת לישון יותר ויותר מאוחר) ובמידה והם צריכים לתפקד (לקום לבית ספר או לעבודה) הם הופכים לחשוכי שינה וסובלים מעייפות מוגברת עליה הם לעתים מפצים בתנומות יום או בשינה מוגברת בסופי שבוע.

גורמים שמשפיעים על שנתו של הילד

השינה מושפעת מגורמים רבים ומגוונים.

• המצב הבריאותי של הילד הוא אחד הגורמים המשפיעים ביותר על שנתו. ילדים שסובלים מבעיות בריאות שקשורות לכאב פיזי (דלקות אוזניים, כאבי בטן, גזים, בעיות עיכול, כאבי ראש וכדומה), בעיות נשימתיות (שקדים מוגדלים, חסימות בדרכי הנשימה, אסטמה) או אלרגיות (אלרגיה של העור, רגישות יתר לחלב פרה) הם פגיעים יותר לבעיות שינה במהלך התפתחותם. נראה גם שישנם ילדים שאצלם נושא השינה הוא רגיש ופגיע ביותר מינקות, כנראה על רקע של רגישות פיזיולוגית שמקורה לא ברור.
• המצב הרגשי של הילד גם הוא יכול להשפיע בצורה דרמטית על שנתו. השינה היא מצב של פרידה והתנתקות מדמויות החשובות של ההורים והיא מעוררת חרדה אצל ילדים רבים. השינה היא גם מצב שבו מסיבות אבולוציוניות בני אדם מרגישים פגיעים ביותר. מצבי לחץ של הילד ובמשפחה יכולים להשפיע בצורה דרמטית על שנתו של הילד (ראה מאמר מדעי באנגלית כאן).
• התנהגות ההורים והסביבה משפיעה גם היא בצורה דרמטית על התפתחות שנתו של הילד. מגיל צעיר ההורים הם אלה שאמורים לאותת לילד שהלילה נועד לשינה, לסייע לו לרכוש תחושת ביטחון בתנאי השינה שכוללים חושך ובדרך כלל גם ניתוק זמני מהקשר הרציף עם ההורים. במקרים רבים ילד ששנתו בעייתית גורר את ההורים לתגובות בעייתיות שלא מצליחות לסייע לו בפתרון בעיית השינה ולעתים אף מחמירות אותה. הטיפול בהפרעות שינה של תינוקות וילדים מתבסס במידה רבה על הדרכה של ההורים כיצד הם יכולים להשפיע ולסייע לילד לשפר את דפוסי השינה שלו.

הקשר בין שינה להתפתחות

לשינה בילדות קשר הדוק לבעיות התפתחות, קשיי למידה, קשב וריכוז ולבעיות התנהגות של הילד. הבעיות עלולות לנבוע הן מכך שהילד אינו ישן די הצורך (בהתאם לגילו וצרכיו הפיזיולוגיים) והן משום ששנתו היא משובשת ואינה מרעננת די הצורך. כך למשל יקיצות מרובות במהלך הלילה קשורות למזג (טמפרמנט) יותר קשה, לבעיות התנהגות, קשב, ריכוז ולמידה אצל ילדים (ראה מאמר מדעי באנגלית כאן). המחקר מלמד שילדים רבים (במיוחד בישראל) אינם ישנים די הצורך וככל הנראה משלמים על כך מחיר מצטבר של עייפות מוגברת ותפקוד ירוד (ראה מאמר מדעי באנגלית כאן).

O mau sono do filho pode ser culpa dos pais

O mau sono do filho pode ser culpa dos pais - Bebê até 1 ano - Guia do Bebê

Sabe aquela hora da noite em que acordamos sem motivo ou porque estamos sonhando? Voltamos a dormir sozinhos, não é? Os bebês também devem aprender a voltar a dormir sozinhos. Caso contrário, poderão ter problemas para dormir a noite toda depois do primeiro ano de vida.
Os bebês cujos pais tentam fazê-los dormir toda vez que choram têm uma pior qualidade de sono nos primeiros anos de vida. Pelo menos é isso que concluiu um estudo feito por pesquisadores israelenses publicado na revista “Child Development”.
A pesquisa acompanhou 85 famílias com bebês pequenos através de diários de sono, questionários e entrevistas. Os autores do estudo Liat Tikotzky e Avi Sadeh, do departamento de psicologia, desvendaram que os bebês que receberam pouca atenção durante a noite dormiram melhor e por mais tempo do que os bebês que receberam mais cuidados quando acordavam a noite.
Concluíram também que os pais que confortam seus bebês a noite toda são mais ansiosos que os pais que deixam seus bebês chorarem. Lógico. Nem sempre o choro é sinal de um grave problema. Às vezes é um simples choro passageiro. Além disso, dormir pouco após nascimento do bebê aumenta o risco da mamãe ter depressão pós-parto.
Avisos - Hábitos como segurar o bebê no colo, alimentá-lo fora do horário ou deixá-lo dormir na cama do casal quando o pequeno chora a noite são atitudes que agravam a qualidade do sono do bebê e dos pais. Esses bebês provavelmente terão dificuldades em dormir a noite toda nos dois primeiros anos de vida, afirma a pesquisa.
Imagine se o seu filho se acostuma a dormir sempre na cama dos pais. No dia em que ficar sozinho no quarto ele vai se sentir o ser humano mais desprotegido do mundo. Medo de bicho-papão, entre outras imaginações. Como as receitas infalíveis da vovó: tudo em demasia não é bom!
Lógico que não é para deixar de observar se o bebê está bem, se não tem nenhum problema afligindo o seu sono. Não vai esquecê-lo no quarto. Mas os pais devem deixar um espaço para que seu filho tente a voltar a dormir sozinho sem colo, sem alimentação, sem carinhos durante a noite. Isso não é falta de carinho. É apenas buscar um sono gostoso para seu filho, sem paparico.
Dessa forma, o sono do bebê, da mamãe e do papai será melhor e todos ganharão com uma melhor qualidade de vida.

Dicas
Lembre-se que é durante o sono que alguns hormônios são liberados e que quando maior a criança precisa do sono durante a noite toda.
Se o bebê chorar ou resmungar durante a noite e não estiver no horário da mamada, só observe e deixe que tente dormir sem qualquer intervenção.
Mamãe e papai descansados melhor será a atenção que darão durante o horário em que o bebê estiver acordado durante o dia.

Bruno Rodrigues

10 Essential Baby Milestones

1. Eye contact (between 6 and 8 weeks)
2. Social smile (between 6 and 8 weeks)
3. Cooing (around 8 weeks)
4. Babbling (3 to 4 months)
5. Reaching and grabbing (between 5 and 7 months)
6. Pulling up to a stand (9 to 10 months)
7. Pincer grasp (9 to 11 months)
8. Gesturing (around 12 months)
9. First word (around 12 months)
10. Pretend play (around 18 months)

Read more about it in here: http://www.parenting.com/article/Toddler/Development/10-Essential-Baby-Milestones/ 
 
 
 
  
 
 
  

Household dirt won't raise asthma risk in infants

Phew!!..... Those are good news, since from the time we had the baby I had to fire the cleaning lady, and we never have enough time or strength to clean as well as she did!... :)

Read more about it in here: http://www.babycenter.com/204_household-dirt-wont-raise-asthma-risk-in-infants_10328411.bc?scid=momsbaby_20100302_B:2&pe=2UyDtEm

For those who are still trying...

 

Trying to get pregnant? This fertility and ovulation calculator can tell you the best days to try to conceive. It can even tell you your baby's possible due date! To determine when you're most likely to conceive, go to their site: http://www.parenting.com/Fertility/FertilityCalculator/fertilityCalculator.jsp?genID=1&typeID=800 and good luck! :)

Pregnancy - it's beautiful and magic, but Joanne Kimes is right: it really sucks.

Written by me on Jun 28, 2009


Explaining the title: the 1st pregnancy book I got is called "Pregnancy Sucks - What to do when your miracle makes you miserable", of Joanne Kimes. Wonderful book. Intelligent, informative and specially very very funny. Recommended to every mother-to-be.

So!! The thing is, I am a bit pregnant. No, actually I think I'm passed the point where I can say "a bit". I am very much pregnant. How far away am I? Well, pregnancy math is one of the most paradoxically complicated things on Earth, comparable to that very philosophical question "why would Donald Duck wear a towel on his bottom when he comes out the shower, if normally he doesn't wear any pants?". The thing is, when you count time - for example - when a baby is born, or when you start a company or a relationship, you wait until the end of a month, for example, to say "my baby/company/relationship is one month old". When you're pregnant, you don't wait till the end of the month to say you're one month pregnant. You just say "I'm on the 1st month". So, although I am now on the 5th month, if I had started a company on the same day I got pregnant, I'd say that my company is 4 months old. Probably for this reason doctors decided that the best is to say simply "I'm on the 18th week", and just let the others do the math. Was this understandable at all? If not, don't bother. If you ever get pregnant, then start worrying about it.
The big problem with pregnancy is all the things people don't talk about, and unfortunately you start finding out only after you're already there. Oh yes. Did you think pregnancy was just that magical time when a woman grows bigger and bigger together with the expectations and the smile in her face, and everything is a sea of roses? WRONG! There are a lot of not-so-bright stuff in the middle, and a whole lot of nasty stuff as well.
I'm positive that one of the worst things is what I call "encouraging talks". All the stuff people decide start revealing after you get pregnant. I mean, when you read about all these stuff in a book, feels like you're learning things that probably many people doesn't know about.When people tell you, it's like saying "now that you can't go back, let's dig the hole a bit deeper so you can feel a bit more miserable".
Starting by your doctor friends. Yes, they're nice and sweet and they're always there to answer all the questions you may have at any time of the day. Suddenly, though, for some reason, one decides to tell you about how they insert their whole arm inside a woman's uterus after the baby is born in order to clean the remains of placenta. Yes, that's true, apparently doctors do that.
They will also feel a need to tell you that, many times in normal births, they make a small cut in the vagina so that when the baby comes out, he doesn't lacerate the vagina. That's right, this is exactly the word he used. Lacerate. Wasn't life nicer before you could think about the possibility of your vagina being lacerated?

2 great books to read when you're expecting

These are 2 very humorous but very didactic books on pregnancy and birth, based on these 2 women's personal experience. For people that, like me, have no patience whatsoever to books like "what to expect when you're expecting" that looks much more like a technical school book, these books teach you all you need to know in a funny and interesting way!

 

Find "Belly Laughs" at Amazon

  

Find "Pregnancy Sucks" in Amazon

Cool Mom Picks

 

On their own words, they're "just a few moms that track down cool stuff so you can stay busy being fabulous."

http://www.coolmompicks.com/

The Epidural

http://video.about.com/pregnancy/During-an-Epidural.htm

A few links in hebrew

Eating on pregnancy
Rehov Herayion
Materna Club
Shilav Club

Materna & Shilav Club will send you weekly newsletters on the development of your pregnancy.

Pregnancy Video

Your Pet and Your Baby

http://www.dogmanners.com/Yournew.htm

Your new "Pack Member"
Introducing Your Dog to a New Baby 
By Martin Guerra 

All the preparations have been completed! You've had the baby shower! Grandma and Grandpa have begun the spoiling ritual! The baby's room is ready! The day to bring baby home finally arrives. But wait!! What about Fido! Has he/she been prepared for the new arrival?? How is Fido going to react?
Bringing your baby home from the hospital is an exciting time. But there could be a problem lurking if you have not taken the time to prepare the "canine kid" for the baby's arrival. This is especially important when your pooch has been "top dog" up to now. By taking the time, being patient, consistent and following some simple guidelines you can make this union less traumatic and make it very successful and rewarding for all.


BEFORE BABY ARRIVES

1) Make sure your dog is obedience trained and responding well to your verbal commands. (Don't expect your dog to obey your commands if it has not been taught to do so.)
If your dog has had some obedience training take the time now to practice and reinforce those commands. It will give you peace of mind knowing that when you say "sit," "down," "stay," or "off" your dog will do it. Also, having your dog walking at heel when you're pushing that stroller can be invaluable.
    A. Curbing any mouthing or biting behavior is critical. Your dog's "play-bite," "love-nip," or "teething," etc. can cause a serious injury to an infant or toddler!!
    B. Begin to reduce the amount of attention you give your dog. It will be difficult for your dog to accept the baby when he associates it with not getting as much attention. In addition, if the dog is very demanding and nudges, paws at, barks, etc. for your attention, he could injure, frighten or wake the baby. So, begin to lower the dog's "rank" and steadily reduce the amount of attention you give him, because you sure won't have the time to shower him/her with loads of attention once the baby arrives.
When your dog is "in shape" and responding to your commands the whole process will be a lot easier as you will have the much needed control over the dog during the initial introduction and subsequent weeks.

2). Expose your dog, in a controlled manner (on leash), to as many babies as possible. Babies look, smell, sound and move differently than big humans. Get your dog as familiar with babies as you can NOW. Do this in a positive manner; offer treats, toys petting or anything the dog enjoys when it is near a baby. Remain calm and in control during the whole process. If your dog is behaving inappropriately, calmly and without emotion, remove the dog and try again later.
Begin "child proof" handling of the dog! Once your child reaches toddler age and is bantering about in the vertical position, one of the things he/she will most likely do is to grab the doggy: pulling the tail, giving hugs, drumming on, tripping over, pinching, etc. These can be threatening or challenging behaviors to your dog, causing it to react. Begin by presenting a special treat to the dog. As he/she is nibbling on the treat begin to grab, poke hug, pinch, etc. Do these gently at first, gradually increase the level of intensity over time. By getting your dog used to things now can save you a lot of grief later.
    A. Food bowl safety is another important area. Get the dog used (enjoying) others near it's bowl. While he/she is eating, put your hand into the bowl and drop a really special treat or two. Do this frequently. 
    B. Make a lot of noise around the dog. Act like a child by running through the house screaming. Yeah it sound goofy, but your dog will learn to take it in stride and not be freaked out when the baby screams or the toddler runs through the house during a full blown tantrum binge.

3) When you are preparing the house i.e., the baby's room, let your dog spend ample time in that room; teach him to lie-down in a specific area and give a special toy to chew on. Make any necessary corrections you have to and don't forget to PRAISE when the dog is being good. You want the dog to understand that he/she can be in there but it must behave accordingly.

4) A day or so before you bring baby home from the hospital, take home a blanket the baby has been wrapped in, or a cap and present them to your dog along with some yummy treats. Let him/her smell it thoroughly. This will get the dog familiar with your baby's scent, therefore, when your dog and baby meet for the first time, your dog will recognize the scent of your baby and should be more receptive. DO NOT let the dog play with it. NOTE: The blanket/scent should be associated with GOOD BEHAVIOR, not thrashing, tugging or dragging around, etc. Each time you present the scent item to the dog have him "sit" and lavish him/her with praise and treats. By doing this frequently, the dog learns to associate the scent with sitting and getting a treat.


BABY COMES HOME

1) When you bring baby home, it is a good idea for a neutral person to carry the baby into the house while you carry out your normal "dog greeting routine." Keep your greetings brief and calm.

2) After you have greeted the dog it is a good idea to put your dog's leash on for the first few encounters; that way you will have the physical control needed to prevent any inappropriate behavior. It is important to introduce the dog to the baby. This makes it clear to the dog that the baby is a new member of the "pack".
Put the baby in your lap and let the dog sniff the baby. Keep a very watchful eye on the dog; it is not okay for the dog to muzzle, nudge or paw at the baby. Pair these exercises with very positive reinforcement. Use a very special food treat that the dog normally doesn't get. The dog will learn that the presence of the baby brings good things.
If the dog does something inappropriate, calmly and WITHOUT emotion, put the dog up and try again later. Remember to positively reinforce your dog for all appropriate behavior!!
The dog may start to bark at the baby. If this occurs, distract the dog and engage it in another reinforceable behavior. If that doesn't work then immediately put the dog up. He/she will learn that barking cause him to go away, and being quiet causes him to get "cookies" he/she will make the right choice. Be PATIENT and PERSISTENT!

3) When your dog is behaving acceptably toward the baby you will need to positively reinforce him/her. Your reinforcement should occur whenever your dog is being good, i.e., quietly lying down, sitting or engaging in any behavior you deem acceptable. Reinforcement should be something the dog really loves.
NOTE: Enthusiastic, energetic and physical PRAISE may excite your dog, causing it to become "hyper" or break the last command you gave it.

4) When the baby comes home, give the dog a treat or new toy and keep to the dog's normal routine as much as possible. This will help your dog to associate the baby's presence with positive things.


DON'TS

1) Do not exclude your dog; if you have a house dog do not throw it outside once baby arrives. Conversely, if you have an outside dog make sure he/she has plenty of exposure to the baby. It is vital your dog and baby have the chance to bond and develop a relationship.

2) Do not ignore your dog during routine interaction with the baby. For example: If you are bathing the baby and your dog follows you or comes in a little later, do not chase him/her away. If you are feeding the baby allow the dog to sit next to you and as you feed (or wash) the baby talk to the dog, let him/her know what a GOOD DOG he/she is. As long as the dog is behaving let him/her be a part of the activity. If the dog misbehaves then make the necessary correction and continue on. Remember to be PATIENT and CONSISTENT.

3) Do not allow your dog to sleep/lay under the crib or cradle. A dog can upset a crib or cradle or knock down the side rails. As a general rule, the baby's toys and equipment should be off limits to your dog. Give a clear signals and set clear boundaries.

4) DO NOT EVER LEAVE YOUR BABY AND DOG ALONE FOR ANY AMOUNT OF TIME NO MATTER HOW STABLE AND TRUSTWORTHY YOU FEEL YOUR DOG IS!! Your dog is still a dog, an animal. ALWAYS put safety first and monitor EVERY interaction your dog and child have. Your presence will remind the dog that you are in charge and insure a calm interaction between the two.


THINGS TO LOOK OUT FOR

 1) POSSESSIVENESS - This is the dog claiming the baby as its own and doing what it feels is necessary to protect it. This can also happen if the dog feels threatened or he feels the "Pack" is threatened by the new intruder, the baby. This will need to be corrected IMMEDIATELY. Seek professional help if this occurs.

2) MARKING - This is your dog urinating (marking) on things. The dog could be remarking it's territory over the new scent of the baby. It is the dogs way of telling the baby (the new "pack" member) that this is his turf. Keep things you don't want peed on up. And if you catch the dog beginning to mark something, startle him/her by making a loud noise and escorting him/her outside when he/she stops.

3) DESTRUCTIVE BEHAVIOR - Could result from a lack of attention, anxiety or jealousy. Do more obedience work and give your pooch some additional exercise.

4) If you have multiple dogs in the your home, brining a new baby into the environment can upset the pack dynamic among the dogs. It is important that you maintain the established hierarchy. Keep the existing routine and feeding schedules as much as possible. Greet the "top-dog" first, the middle dog second, etc. Let the top-dog out/in first, etc. This will go a long way to keeping the dynamic stable


FINAL REMINDER

You need to show your dog what is and isn't acceptable behavior. You must take care of inappropriate behavior immediately. You DO NOT need to STRIKE or SHOUT at your dog. You want to make ALL the interactions between your baby and dog a POSITIVE EXPERIENCE. You also need to reinforce your dog and let it know when he/she is doing what you want. THIS ALL MAY TAKE TIME! BE CONSISTENT AND PATIENT DURING THE WHOLE PROCESS. YOUR DOG WILL ADJUST TO THE NEW SITUATION.

Do's and Dont's

DO

• Sleep on your side with a pillow between your legs.
• Bend your knees (squat) to pick things up from the floor or low places.
• Use a step stool to reach high shelves.
• Drink plenty of fluids, preferably water.
• Take off rings if they get too tight on your fingers.
• Sit or stand with your shoulders and back relaxed .
• When sitting, keep your feet flat on the floor.
• Be aware that your center of gravity and balance point is changing.
• Place one foot on a low step stool if you are standing for a long period of time.
• Use a desk chair that fits you comfortably and supports your lower back.
• Adjust your car seat and steering wheel to accommodate your changing shape.
• Wash your hands thoroughly when handling uncooked meat.
• Limit caffeine intake and cut out alcohol and tobacco.

DON'T

• Hold your breath while lifting or lift heavy loads. Check with your health care provider regarding exact weight limitations.
• Hunch over your desk.
• Sit for periods longer than 30 minutes without taking a stretch break.
• Sit with your knees crossed.
• Clean kitty's litter box, or do garden work without wearing gloves.
• Strain to have a bowel movement.
• Fully immerse in a Jacuzzi or hot tub over 99 degrees Fahrenheit.
• Have laser hair removal
• OVEREXERT! If you become too tired or a little short of breath, LISTEN to your body and rest. 

Taken from http://www.babies.sutterhealth.org/during/preg_dosdonts.html

Things that are safe during pregnancy

• Exercise
• Sex
• Asthma medicine
• Hair dye
• Fake tan
• Microwaves and computers

Things to be cautious about during pregnancy

• Alcohol
• Tight jeans
• Flu jabs
• Paracetamol
• Cleaning products
• Caffeine
• Diarrhea medicines
• X-rays
• Flying
• Hay fever medication
• Paint
• Aromatherapy
• Thrush medication

Things to avoid during pregnancy

• Jacuzzis and saunas
• Smoky pubs and clubs
• Underwired bras
• Cystitis remedies
• Tampons
• Cat litter
• Vaccinations

5 golden rules for a safe pregnancy

1. Read the label
2. Don’t assume ‘natural’ means safe
3. Don’t give in to peer pressure
4. Use your common sense
5. Don’t let anxiety ruin this special time

Read more about this in here:

http://www.madeformums.com/practicalparenting/pregnancy-diet-and-fitness/pregnancy-dos-and-donts/2491.html

What you should eat during pregnancy

What you should eat:
• Food containing folic acid (green leafy vegetables, including spinach and watercress, nuts, pulses, wholegrains and fruit juice)
• Food containing iron (red meat, pulses, bread, green vegetables, fortified breakfast cereals)
• Fiber, lots of it (wholegrain bread, pasta, rice, pulses and fruit and vegetables)! It is very common for pregnant women to be constipated, so start having lots of fiber from the beginning.
• Dairy products (milk, cheese and yogurt)

What you shouldn't eat:
• Anything that isn't cooked enough. That means that your fried eggs need to be very well done (yeah, no raw yellow part), no paté (only if you do it at home not from liver and are certain that it's cooked. Most restaurants serve it raw, as well as the one you buy on the supermarket), no sushi, no undercooked meat... well, you got the idea.
• Alcohol
• Caffeine. That means also regular tea, cola drinks and energy drinks like red bull.
• Liver
• Aspartame
• Soft blue cheeses



A few links on the matter...

http://www.pregnancy-info.net/foods_to_avoid.html
http://www.eatwell.gov.uk/agesandstages/pregnancy/whenyrpregnant/
http://www.nhs.uk/Planners/pregnancycareplanner/pages/Eating.aspx
http://www.nhs.uk/Livewell/pregnancy/Pages/healthyeating.aspx

Getting Started

So, I have a lot of stuff to share, so I'll try to start on pregnancy related links and then later baby related links, and so on.

Calculate your due date

http://pregnancy.about.com/cs/pregnancycalendar/l/blpregcalc.htm

Hey, welcome to the geeky mommy!

So! I'm a fresh 1st-time mommy to baby Lior, a sweet little boy who's 2 and a half months by the time I finally decided to open this blog.
Pregnancy has been quite a journey and I, being the geek I am, couldn't stop browsing the internet in a never-ending quest for information about what's going on with me and the baby. I have put together a large amount of material (and I'm still adding to it everyday) which I think is worth to place it all in one single place, either for myself or to share around with other geeky mommies as myself. I seriously doubt it that I'm gonna write too much, but I intend to post relevant links whenever I find them interesting so... well I guess that's about it :)